A Separate Peace

Years before Lynn and Sandra Davis broke ground on their dream home, each of them was already dreaming of special spaces to incorporate into that house: a tree house–like sanctuary for her, a book-filled billiards room for him.

“I’d heard about Sandra’s tree house for at least 20 years,” Lynn Davis says. “She’d been talking about it forever. And I had wanted a space of my own since I negotiated a [business] contract in a men’s club in London. I fell in love with the dark, cherry wood, the leather and the rows and rows of books. I came home from that trip and described it to Sandra as the space I wanted just for me.”

When the Davises finally sat down to draft the details of their dream house with Dale Mulfinger, a principal with SALA Architects, Inc., in Excelsior, in 1996, those rooms were at the top of their wish list. So Mulfinger designed a three-story house with a sunny studio on one end for Sandra and a darker library and game room for Lynn on the other. In between is a spacious great room with high ceilings and huge windows.

Such separate spaces—one for him, another for her—are becoming more and more common in high-end homes across the country. Although the Davises do share a bedroom, as well as most of the other spaces in their home, a survey by the National Association of Home Builders released last February reported that builders and architects expect that the average upscale home will include dual master bedrooms by 2015. Even those who continue to share a sleeping area may look for other ways to carve out their own space: separate bathrooms, separate offices, separate places to play, relax, or pursue their own interests.

This division of space has been heralded as a hot, new trend among many in the media, but builders in the Twin Cities say it’s actually quite an old habit. Mulfinger mentions that several area homes designed by architect Edwin Lundie in the 1940s had separate sleeping spaces. And Mark Peterson, lead designer with M/A/Peterson Design, a home builder and remodeler in Edina, says couples have been requesting separate spaces of one form or another for years. It’s just that now they’re more willing to talk about it, he says.

“This is not something new,” Peterson says. “This is really a human predisposition, a human behavior. It may be one that has been suppressed verbally for some time, but it really is okay to have some separate spaces. It’s good to create something that fits everybody’s needs, that accomplishes what everybody wants.”

“The need has always been there,” Mulfinger adds. “But now people maybe have a little more freedom and a little more interest in pursuing it in different ways. It used to be that the garage was the guy’s space and the kitchen was her world. But now, in this urban and suburban life, that has been altered. People have different needs now.”

Splitting Up

At least in Minnesota, separation doesn’t seem to start in the bedroom. Few builders report requests for extra sleeping space, or at least not space that’s designated as such. Some have added a second owner’s suite to a design, but often because an older couple is planning to house a live-in caretaker or a younger couple is anticipating living with an aging parent.

“It’s less a his-and-her issue as it is planning for the future,” says Steven Sexton, co-owner of Minnetonka Custom Homes in Minnetrista. “I guess they might be using it for his or her, but that conversation isn’t taking place with us. Up here, people tend to be fairly conservative. They just might not be talking about it.”

Jack Smuckler, president and architect at Edina-based Smuckler Architecture, Inc., has designed a 10-by-12-foot room just off a client’s master suite that’s designated as the “snoring room.” Mulfinger has likewise seen space allotted near the suite that may be officially labeled as a den, study, or office, but it serves a secondary purpose when one spouse’s sleep is disturbed.